Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Crappy Mommy Awards

I did a crappy thing this morning.

Mads is sitting on the floor, playing with the toys in her toy basket, picking one up and chewing on it, throwing it down to pick another to slobber all over. I wanted a picture of her chewing on her basket, but my camera was on the kitchen counter. I assessed the situation, I could either knock her down and get the camera at a leisurely pace, or I could leave her to sit two feet away while I made a mad dash to the counter. She's been sitting unassisted for up to twenty minutes at a time, but I've always been right there. I'm like lightening, so I chose to let her sit while I went the two feet to the counter. Bad choice, Mommy. Bad choice. I hadn't even gotten the whole way off the floor, I'm in that 'one knee still down' stage of standing when I hear, THUD. It was like slow motion from there. By the time I could turn my head there was "WAaaHaaaH". My baby is face down, her nose smooshed into that stupid little CD player, and she's screaming. I scooped her up and gave her hugs, kissed her nose, her cheeks, her teeth, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, so sorry sorry sorry. Her screams turned into a whimper, the whimper into a smile, and the smile into a baby kiss. She wasn't mad, but I was on the verge of having a panic attack.

Just to rub some salt in my gaping guilt wound, when she wanted picked up after sitting just fine for a good 12 minutes (of course now she can do it), I tried to grab the comb that she had been chewing on and elbowed her right in the forehead. Shit. In my defense, I'm used to her head being on the floor, not hovering right around elbow level. My poor kid is just getting her ass kicked today and it's not even noon.

Edit: It's 11:58 so I have one more to add before noon. She just bashed her face off the turtle on her Exersaucer. I'm not sure how I could have prevented that one, but it makes me feel guilty just the same. I think I'm going to take us both to bed and put the covers over our heads until Jeffrey gets home. It has to be much safer compared to the thousands of dangers in this damn living room.

I just don't know what's going on today. It's very "Dr. Seuss Wacky Wednesday." There will probably be a shoe on the ceiling before too long. What an off day.

The pictures that started it all:

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