Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Stupid Teeth

Madelynn is having an awful day. She likes to suck her thumb while she falls asleep for a nap, but every time she tries, she wails. I'm assuming it hurts her tooth because she's never acted like this before. She won't eat either, when she tries, she gets one good suck in and then starts screaming. It's so sad, and so damn frustrating, for both of us. She's miserable, I'm miserable, and I can't wait until Jeffrey gets home so he can be miserable with us. I've been holding out on doing anything for her, I've heard that Orajel can make it hard for her to swallow all that drool, so I haven't even used it yet. After about an hour of tears, when all she wanted was to sleep, I finally broke down and gave her Tylenol. I medicated my baby. I feel awful. But, it worked. She's been sleeping for the past half hour with her thumb tightly screwed in her mouth and we feel so much better. Teeth suck.

One down, nineteen to go.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Bath Hair


Sunday, August 24, 2008

Good Lord

So Mady was chewing on my knuckle, which isn't weird, she does it all the time. But THIS time something was scratching me so I yanked my hand out of her mouth. There was a little drop of blood on my finger. It wasn't mine. My baby has a tooth. A very sharp tooth. I didn't have anything cold and handy besides a bag of baby carrots in the fridge so she happily chewed on one of those for a while. I went to Walmart and bought all kinds of teething supplies including a little finger toothbrush thing. It's only the tip of one tiny tooth but damnit, I'm prepared. I wonder what this means for my nipples? It can't be good.

My baby isn't a baby anymore. I'm so freaking sad.

While I was looking for the infamous Baby Orajel (for "Fast, Teething Relief!) I saw a purple Bumbo. You know those stupid, overpriced, plastic baby seats? Yeah, I bought one. What's 40 bucks when she so obviously loves the thing?

Maybe "love" is a little strong. Let's go with "tolerates".

Workin' Girl Part 2

I got my first work schedule. Two days. Like ten hours. It's perfect. What can I possibly miss in ten hours out of a week? Well now that I think about it, I guess a lot could happen in ten hours.

I'm super excited though. I'm learning how to socialize all over again. Can you believe some people aren't interested in hearing about Mady's latest trick? I had no idea! I just assumed that after I had a baby, everyone else would want to talk about rolling over, thumb sucking, and what the best diapers are. Nope. No one gives a damn. It's kind of nice, although I can't for the life of me remember what I used to talk about before Mady. Drugs, booze, sex, and the best way to steal soup? I guess so. People my age are entertaining to say the least. I can't believe I forgot all about them.

I miss Madelynn the whole time I'm gone, but it's OK. I feel like when I come home, I'm a better Mommy. I'm more tolerant of her crying spells, I appreciate every smile, and I have more things to talk about with her. I think getting a job is the best thing I could have done for our relationship. Even if I don't make any money, being social will make it totally worth it. I don't even care if I like any of the people I work with!

I'm so glad Jeffrey and I chose to be poor and happy, rather than throw our baby in some daycare. It's not like the sex isn't as good when you're broke. Going out to eat only on special occasions, and saving up for the little luxuries that we want (playstation 3 anyone?), is totally worth it if it means I can stay home with my baby 158 hours a week. And whatever I make in those 10 off hours, can go to Mady's college fund. How else will we ever be able to send my little genius to school?

My mother told me that this is exactly what her and Daddy did when I was a baby. She worked three nights a week waitressing while he worked full time. As the years went by, Daddy continued to move up in his position until it got to the point where Mum's income was just plain silly. She quit and was a stay at home mom for like ever, and honestly, I can't even remember her not being home so it must have been AGES ago. She stayed home until she was called upon to take care of my paternal grandparents, whom she gave up her life for, for 13 long years after she had already given it up so long for her own children (I have never met a more selfless person than my own mother). She just got her first "real" job at the age of 51 because taking care of their cat just wasn't enough anymore, and I couldn't be happier for her. I could totally live that dream (as long as I'm tending to my OWN parents... kidding, kidding). Now I just have to figure out how to get Jeffrey to go to work on time. Hm.

Oh look. Feet!


Thursday, August 21, 2008

Thankful Thursday

I guess there are rules to blogging. Thursdays are "thankful Thursdays" where you apparently write about what you're thankful for that week. Wednesdays are "word free Wednesdays" which I assume either involves using only pictures, or just not writing at all. And then there's Monday gratification, which sounds a lot like thankful Thursday, if you ask me. I swear I didn't make that all up, I'm not that creative. Unfortunately, someone is. I don't intend to make my blog meet this ridiculous criteria, but I thought thankful Thursday was a good idea considering that it is, in fact, Thursday.

-I'm thankful for automatic breast pumps, and outlets to plug them into.
-For Jeffrey being a super-Daddy and trying to help out around the house while he does it.
-For the T.V. show, "I Love Money". Pointless reality entertainment amuses me like nothing else can.
-For the wonderful people at the Pampers factory. No one can make super-absorbent diapers quite like the fantabulous workers in those pseudo sweatshops.
-For my digital camera. How else could I get pictures like this:




Sunday, August 17, 2008

Guess I was right




She sits! Tummy time can kiss my untanned ass! Besides this...


And just for fun...



It's Rambo Baby!

Friday, August 15, 2008

A Workin' Girl

I have a job. I hate it.

I don't hate the job really, well at least not yet, but I hate that I actually have to leave the house to get there. All this time, I've been bitching about how lonely it is to be a stay-at-home mom, how boring nap time can be, how sad it is that the highlight of my day is matching Jeffrey's million pairs of socks. But now that I've actually left the house, not once, twice, I would much rather be staring at my baby while she naps than sitting in some training session supplementing our income. What if I miss something? What if Mady's first word is "MaMa" and I'm not there to hear it? What if she crawls to the bathroom and destroys her first roll of toilet paper while I'm inquiring if some stupid stranger 'wants fries with that'? I would cry. Angry bursts of tears, probobly accompanied by childish screams of "it's not fair!!". And it's not fair. Why can't everyone just have their damn cake AND eat the high calorie goodness?

I will miss some firsts. The only semi-good thing about this is that Jeffrey will get to experience his own firsts with Madelynn. I feel like he's been missing a lot, seeing his baby do amazing things on a little camera screen instead of in the front row where I've been sitting all this time. Sure, she rolls for him, laughs at "the diaper song" when he sings it, saves up enough drool to give him his fair share when he gets home, but I've gotten all the firsts. First smile, first roll, first laugh, first thumb sucking success, and the first look at her love for a silly purple kitty. Plus a million "etcs".

Another super point is that Jeffrey finally realizes what my days are like. The past two days I've been gone, for six hours straight, Jeffrey has been playing Mr. Mom. When I walked in last night, he said, "I thought babysitting Mady would mean I could play Call of Duty the whole time. That's definitely not the case". I had to laugh. Play video games all day? Yeah right. He's lucky he showered before I left or he wouldn't ever get that either. Downside? Mady hates tummy time, and as soon as she starts crying, I pick her up. I just can't stand to see her face smooshed into the carpet with tears coming from her eyes. What does Jeffrey do? Lets her cry. He sits there and tells her if she doesn't stay on her stomach, she'll never crawl, walk, or sit. He's trying to reason with a 3 month old. I hate that.

Mady will do everything in her own time, whether she's early, late, or right on time by those silly developmental standards. And just because someone else's baby does something, doesn't mean she has to. I'm fine with letting her be a baby for as long as she wants. I don't want a prodigy, I just want a happy, healthy baby. If she has to crawl to kindergarten, I'll let him say "I told you so".

As long as I can get this through Jeffrey's head, maybe working won't be so bad.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

In Case I Forget

I fully intend to make Mady read this blog when she's about my age. I wish my own mother had done something like this, so I could really know her. You just never know though, until you have your own baby.


There is no smell, like the smell, of a clean baby.

Baby hair is the best hair in the world, and even when it falls out, it still smells wonderful.

Little feet can still kick really hard.

Little hands have the tightest grip and look best wrapped around my finger.

A sleeping baby is the most beautiful thing in the world.

Second most beautiful thing, the look of contentment on a hungry baby's face when you feed her.

A smile is worth way more than a thousand words.

Kissing drool really isn't that bad. Totally doable.

There is nothing softer, or more perfect, than a baby's skin.

Blue eyes can turn to brown eyes, or they can stay blue with a ring of brown in the middle. Whichever happens, they are spectacular.

Baby gums look like they actually hold teeth, and I'm dreading the day they actually crop up.

There is no pain in the world worse than a tear on your baby's cheek. If there's a tear, it's really bad.

A screaming baby can be totally annoying, but the second they stop, your mind can't remember it.

Bath-time is not fun, and I fear that it will never be.

There's nothing that can replace the weight of a baby on your chest.

Shots hurt. Period.

You're going to tell me you hate me someday, and I already know, that will hurt forever.

An entire life changes in 41 weeks, it seems like a long time when it's happening, but it's actually too short.

There aren't enough hours in a day, days in a year, years in a lifetime. I don't want this to end.

It's hard not to cry, thinking about a day when I might forget what this is really like, every little detail.

You smile in your sleep, Madelynn. It breaks my heart every time.

I'm scared, of you, and for you.


They talk about people wearing their heart on their sleeve. I wear my heart in a hotsling every day.

Friday, August 8, 2008

The Baby Whisperer

Mady loves to talk to Jeffrey. I'll spend 20 hours alone with the girl and hear nothing, not a peep. Daddy walks in the door and she becomes a screetching, yelping, beautiful mess. I can't understand a damn thing she says. Jeff can. And she understands him. It's like that woman on T.V. that can talk to animals, the animals always bitching about how bad their owner is. They share secrets about me. They're assholes.





Mady: Mommy scratched me today.



Jeff: She yelled at me today.



Mady: Oh yeah? Well she made the playmat babysit ME today.



Jeff: That's nothing compared to the lack of sex I'M getting.


Actually, I have no idea what they talk about. I don't speak bullshitish, but I'm sure it's something along those lines. Damn kids.



Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Can't Nobody Breaka my Stride

Mady has been rolling on accident for a long time now. Back to stomach. We have now conquered stomach to back. MY BABY IS MOBILE!!

Obviously I am quite excited. Does my voice give it away?